New Song!

So, I'm writing some original music. I've already written a song (this song), but it took me some time to find time to record it. I have, and I want to get some opinions on it.

So, before I give you the song, let me give some background.

This will be the first song you hear. I want it to set the mood of the main character Max. *Gasp* Was I allowed to say that?!?! Too late. Anyway, I plan on doing a little montage matching the lyrics. So, if it says that he doesn't do well in school, I may have a clip of his teacher handing back reports or tests or something and we see that he gets a D-, or something.

PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS IS NOT THE FINAL VERSION. I plan on adding some drums, and som piano, and extra voices, and maybe a little extra guitar doing some riffs or something. Also, I apologise for the parts of the somg where it sounds like someone was blowing on th mic. My mic is a bad mic, so, if I say, like, "he", there will be a bit of a "rush" of air, and the mic picks that up.

So, without further ado, here's the song (Wav file).

Oh, and for those who are curious, here are the lyrics.